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Fake News

The Only Post in r/BirdLovers



gregoryPECK 0 points 1 day, 11 hours ago
Hello, birders of Reddit! I have over 40 years of experience in amateur ornithology and am common-law married to nearly seven dozen warbling angels that sky-walk all over my soul. I know everything (I repeat: everything) there is to know about our fine, feathered friends. Fire away!

gregoryPECK 0 points 23 hours ago
Hi again! I guess I’ll just get this party started on my own. Hmmm…where to start???

I guess one of the things I love most about birds is their desire to be dominated. For being the most free class of animalia on this planet, gifted with the grace to flit balletic through the clouds, governed only by their whims, they certainly react when restrained from flight.

Anybody know what I’m talking about?

gregoryPECK 0 points 15 hours ago
I guess not. Go figure. Well, how about this?

When I awaken each morning in my nestroom and I am surrounded by the light vibrations of my partners’ hearts beating within their voluptuous, keeled breastbones, I’m ready to rise and greet the day, you know what I’m saying? I mean, that is a sensation reserved for the lucky few.

Seventy-six birds, and they’re all molting on ME? Eat your heart out, John James Audubon!

Who’s with me?

gregoryPeck 0 points 3 hours ago
Ok. Here’s the thing:

In 1973, when I started pounding chirp on a regular basis, night in, night out, with pretty much no days off (minus when I was troop-leading my church’s scouts), I was just doing it on—I mean, with—a lark! Today, I feel blessed and privileged to be dusting feathers in a long-term, committed poly-avian relationship.

Really hoping to engage with some like-minded individuals on here.

gregoryPECK 0 points 6 hours ago
For those of you just tuning into the thread, let me get you caught up with a TL;DR:

I FUCK BIRDS BY THE FLOCKFUL AND I AM DESPERATE TO SHARE MY SECRETS.

Celticsfan33 0 points 6 hours ago
DUDE!!! I started this page a few years ago with the intention of sharing GIFs and videos of Larry Bird highlights, not to get my inbox spammed with messages from a bird-molesting geezer. Please stop and PLEASE GET HELP.

gregoryPECK 0 points 6 hours ago
The title of this page is highly misleading.

Celticsfan33 0 points 6 hours ago
No, it’s not. What do you think is more likely? That “Bird lovers” would refer to fans of one of the greatest athletes of all time, or to weirdos who suck on pigeon bills to get their rocks off?

gregoryPECK 0 points 6 hours ago
1) The bird love community is strong and deep. It would not behoove you to draw its ire.
2) To imply that there is no crossover between those who pursue romantic relationships with birds and those who appreciate Larry Bird’s ball-playing would be highly inaccurate, especially considering the fact that Larry Bird himself is a long-term, avid supporter of bird love.
3) To suck on a pigeon’s bill for the length of time necessary to elicit orgasm is inadvisable, unethical, and dangerous. The obstruction of the bird’s nares would cut off oxygenation to the circulatory system and risk its suffocation. It would feel good, though!

 BigBobsBeepers 32,768 points 6 hours ago
“…Larry Bird himself is a long-term, avid supporter of bird love.”
.
.
.
.

WUT.

gregoryPECK 15,494 points 6 hours ago
It’s true. In Larry’s MVP season of 1983–84, he and I spent a very long night together with a bevy of Glaucous macaws, and the next day he posted 29 points and 21 rebounds in a Game 4 overtime NBA Finals win.

Hoopsshooter 8,992 points 6 hours ago
LARRY LEGEND!!!!

Bostonsports04 7,025 points 6 hours ago
We are ALL Bird Lovers!!!!!

Bigchief1986 5,942 points 6 hours ago
You da real MVP!!!

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