Homepage / Comedy Podcasts / Monday Morning Podcast 1-11-16
Clarence Thomas Returns To Senate As White Man Named Brett My Husband Les Moonvez Gave Us Young Sheldon, And That's Good Enough for Me! By: Julie Chen London Mayor Calls For Second Brexit Referendum Fraternity Brothers Make Note Not To Kill Pledge Whose Family Has Lake House Marc Benioff Buys ‘Time’ Magazine For $190 Million White House Increases Number Of Asylum Seekers Allowed To Enter Spike-Filled Refugee Compactor Ted Cruz Attempts To Connect With Voters By Wearing More Handsome Man’s Face As Mask Blood-Spattered Sarah Huckabee Sanders Holds Up Huge Dismembered Penis To Prove Presidential Member Completely Normal Woman Longs For Day When First Female President Can Have Tell-All Book Written About Disgusting Vagina Your Horoscopes — Week Of September 18, 2018 Video Game Character Stares Impotently At Forbidden Realm Beyond Impassable Waist-High Bush Emotional Le’Veon Bell Reveals Holdout A Result Of Forgetting How To Run Is This The Worst Life Hack Ever Made? How to Make an Atom Bomb While Your Roommates Are Out of Town Tips For Long Bike Rides Scientist Close To Developing Life-Saving Vaccine That They Can Rub In Faces Of Their Doubters RuPaul Makes History as Viacom Earns 8 Awards – Viacom Corporate A Massive Storm is Barreling Down on my Family and Conversation with Them Has Never Been Easier Semi-Humorous Meetings with Strange Creatures in the Night The Failing Donald Trump Hires a Posse White Castle Now Selling Veggie Burger Sliders Nationwide The Jerry Duncan Show Interviews Buckwheat Luke, Owen Wilson Recall Meeting On Set Of ‘The Royal Tenenbaums’ Kavanaugh Defends His Originalist Position Fingernail Got Fucking Huge Out Of Nowhere We Want Your House – Howard Zaharoff, Humor Times Cash-Strapped Zuckerberg Forced To Sell 11 Million Facebook Users Senate Republicans Seek To Delay Kavanaugh Vote Until Accuser Properly Smeared Emergency Room Admissions To Soar On Trump’s FEMA Text Alert Trial Kavanaugh Sweating Bullets After Betting Life Savings On Being Confirmed To Supreme Court FEMA Airdrops Emergency Cyanide Pills For Residents Stranded By Hurricane Florence Don’t Blame Me, Blame The Stars! GOP Releases New Letter Supporting Kavanaugh Signed By Orrin Hatch 500 Times Steve Bannon Calls #MeToo Most Powerful Political Movement In World Marine Biologists Reveal That Majority Of World’s Oceans Remain Boring As Shit White House Raises Official Hurricane Florence Death Toll To -17 Our Weirdest Sex Misconceptions Koch Brothers Furious Kavanaugh Never Disclosed That Nation Might Care About Sexual Abuse I Read Your Guidelines, But I’m Submitting This Piece That Clearly Isn’t a Fit for Your Publication Because, Well, Just Read It and You’ll See Why Kavanaugh On Sexual Assault Allegations: ‘I Miss High School’ The Week In Pictures – Week Of September 17, 2018 Maxine Waters Fails Hearing Test | You make the news…We report it! Oh no! Elon Musk went on a heroin user's podcast and shot himself full of junk Um, Actually: Star Trek, Schwarzenegger, and Stoker The Pillow Personality Test | Points in Case Donald Trump Claims He’s Found Obama’s ‘Lost Birth Certificate’ There’s Nothing Quite Like Traveling Abroad and Soaking In All the Rich, Authentic Poverty Pope Summons World’s Bishops For Meeting On Sexual Abuse Frat Brothers Draw All Over Pledge Who Passed Away At Party Second Fatwa Issued On Salman Rushdie For Derivative, Uninspired 13th Novel High School Drama Teacher Already Has Pretty Good Idea Who He’ll Pick For Fall Girlfriend The Onion’s 2018 Emmy Predictions Manafort Reaches Plea Deal With Special Counsel Top 5 Most Potent Celery Strains You’re Upset I Broke Into Your House And Stole A Bunch Of Your Shit. Don’t Worry, I’m Donating Everything To Goodwill Scientists Announce They’ve Completed Mapping The Human G-Spot Woman’s Children Officially Old Enough To Pony Up For Good Birthday Gift This Year Mike Pence Struggling To Reckon With Vision Of Prophet Muhammad Revealing That VP Destined To Become Next President 7 Misdemeanors Every College Kid Justifies as Fine Annual “Throw a Paper Airplane at a Mosque Day” Guidelines Released My First day at the Department for Duplicated Departments Casting Bawl Apple Releases Three New iPhones Latest Polls Show Support for Trump Reduced to Mostly Meth Heads The Onion’s 2018 Fall Movie Preview ‘No Way To Prevent This,’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens ‘Just Tell Me Whose Feet To Wash’ How Colleges Are Appealing To The Digital Native Generation Trump Redirected Nearly $10 Million In FEMA Funds Toward ICE The 8 Types of Players In Every Game of 'Never Have I Ever' New Smithsonian Exhibit Details How Fashion Pioneers Tamed The Frumpy West The Case For And Against Confirming Brett Kavanaugh Gentrification Begets Gentrification – Jim Hightower, Humor Times If Movie Posters Were Honest (September 2018 Edition) Freeloading Refugee Children Taking Up Thousands Of Prison Cells Meant For Real Americans FEMA Officials Panic After Accidentally Evacuating 1 Million Residents In Direction Of Hurricane MoviePass CEO: PLEASE DON'T CANCEL Woman Starting To Worry She Just Has Type Of Face Where Makeup Looks Insane What Your Favorite Type of Apple Says About You Pony Anxiously Waiting For Attendant To Flag Large Child As Too Big For Ride Nurse’s Tray All Scalpels Writer’s Block Busted! Political Speechwriters Edition Study: Nuclear Power Necessary To Cut Climate Emissions Cameraman Strikes Gold With Tubby Fan Eating Ice Cream, Dancing, Holding Baby Sweatshop Worker Doesn’t Even Want To Know Working Conditions Of Place Her Company Gets Fabric 7 Venmo Transactions Between Luke And Owen Wilson That Make It Seem Like They’ve Been Practicing Dentistry On Each Other Apple Fans Disappointed After Company Unveils Same Overpriced CEO That Barely Fucking Works TV ‘n’ Dinner in Trumpworld: What to Cook When You’re Watching Fake News 6 Style Guides For College Freshman Pope Starting To Suspect Bishops Getting Huge Erections During Meeting On Child Sexual Abuse Might Be Pedophiles Whoa, Slow Down There, Buddy. Nobody Dates My Daughter Without Telling Me Which ‘Sailor Moon’ Character They Are First More Than 1 Million Ordered To Evacuate Due To Hurricane Florence Emails Between God and His IT Guy Apple Announces New Trade-In Offer For Customers To Exchange Their Old iPhones For Absolutely Nothing Man Going To Restroom Deputizes Friend To Order Him Another Beer Dermatologist Recommends Not Caring So Much What Other People Think Couple Nervous To Admit They Met Online In Comments Section Of ‘How To Iron Shirt’ Video Superheroes in the Millennial Legion Barack Obama Has Once Again Invited Ahmed To His House To Get Another Look At That Sweet Goddamn Clock He Built U.S. Jobless Claims Fall To 49-Year Low


  1. Hansoloai August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    Hahaha Call these cunts

  2. x  ENZO  x August 2, 2017 9:28 pm


  3. dwdx August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    Ankles and knees together, big meaty side of leg and body absorb the impact instead of your foot bones.

  4. Brian Umholtz August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    I grew up with video games and I played a lot of sports as well. The difference is that I’m less likely to get shot or attacked by an underaged criminal when I’m inside now. I think hip-hop inspired crime is the culprit nowadays.

  5. Ben Phillips August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    HAHA! Me too

  6. sharon “Ragin harris August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    i hate Dr. Phil, he is a fucking joke, and these dumb bitches hang on every word he says. ugh

  7. Igornegao August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    When your advertisement is funny you know your doing your job right. Fuck’s sake, Bill.

  8. Zeigler August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    Of course Dr. Phil’s dragging around a meat hammer, shit like that is God’s cruel joke. He always gives some paste eating fuck a giant dick who’s going to do nothing worthwhile with it besides pound in nails

  9. canned pizza sauce cheap August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    I can never look at Dr. Phil the same way again !! hahahaaa

  10. BassHundreds August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    I like this dad. Good shit!

  11. canned pizza sauce cheap August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    hahaha sedated!

  12. scott August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    well.. my step kid is a huge Pats fan and would love to share the podcasts and Bill’s sports insight..however don’t want to catch heat from the lady. maybe i’ll edit too!

  13. scott August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    Watching F is for Family now..not done with first season.. its freaking great. glad to hear its up for second season

  14. JOE SCUBA DIVER August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    Even with A safety line I would picture the most unrealistic scenario. Such as the the entire building collapsing while I’m climbing it

  15. Skade August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    I would love to go to one of your shows if you are able to add on Edmonton sometime this year

  16. BT Sexylegs August 2, 2017 9:28 pm


  17. Echo Wraith August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    Recipe ‘called” for lol

  18. howardnyc August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    You are only the second Pats fan to call the ‘tuck rule’ game payback for Sugar Bear Hamilton in ’77. I am one Raider fan old enough and big enough to admit, you are absolutely right.

  19. Colleen Brola August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    go cowboys!

  20. earlii August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    Dam show, is sold out you pale limp dick prick. Thanks for the notice!!

  21. Caleb Benningfield August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    Go Hawks!

  22. Señore Egonsy August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    I’m listening.

  23. Angie Gutierrez August 2, 2017 9:28 pm


  24. Chris Kleehammer August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    If you need an architect Bill, let me know!

  25. Wade Turley August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    Thanks for making me picture Dr Phil’s dick you cunt

  26. Angie Gutierrez August 2, 2017 9:28 pm


  27. Brian Donovan August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    dude do you do FanDuel I need a bill burr lineup go to get me a new wheelchair

  28. Drunks & Dunks August 2, 2017 9:28 pm

    i’ll buy that shit from you

  29. Chris Brown August 2, 2017 9:28 pm


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