Homepage / Fake News / I Just Found Out About Socks, And I’ve Gotta Say, Wow
Dog Dies On United Flight After Being Stowed In Overhead Bin Key 2018 Election Primaries To Watch Uber Self-Driving Car Strikes And Kills Pedestrian In Arizona 9 Things About Having Depression Nobody Tells You About Mark Zuckerberg: ‘You Should Be Grateful All Your Incessant Oversharing Online Is Actually Worth Something’ ‘As You Can See, They Are Quite Harmless,’ Says Uber Representative Guiding Detective Through Warehouse Of Sleeping Autonomous Cars Your Horoscopes — Week Of March 20, 2018 We Bet We Know What Kind of Pokemon You Are Based On Your Personal Information I Want My Daughter Back, You Son Of A Bitch vs. Duh, That’s How A Kidnapping Works The Lost Sex and the City Episode That Predicted Cynthia Nixon’s Run ‘My God, I’ve Discovered The Missing Link In The Russia Investigation,’ Think 379,000 Reddit Users Simultaneously Breaking Down the Trump Administration’s Moves and Their Impact on the Tanking Effort Fingerprints On Bathroom Stall Hopefully Just Menstrual Blood Tinker Traitor Soldya Trump Surrendering Trump Boys Solemnly Salute Each Other Before Leaping From White House First-Story Window Pelosi Brain Freeze Episodes Worsen NFL Sues EA To End Production Of Unlicensed ‘Madden’ Video Games Freak Totally Has The Hots For You, Popular-Girl Sources Report Dave From Admissions and Juliet: A Tale of Unrequited Love Toys ‘R’ Us Prepares To Liquidate Business Tulip Popping Up In Middle Of March Must Think It Some Kind Of Hotshot Top ​​Benefits ​​Of​​ Being ​​A​​ Risk-Taker Putin Wins Russian Election Dad Recommends Hotel 10 Miles Away From City You’re Visiting Friend Who Listened To Podcast On Watergate Bursts Into Conversation With Guns Fucking Blazing Midterm Malfunctions – Will Durst, Humor Times Andrew McCabe Spending Few Days As Congressional Bathroom Attendant To Satisfy Pension Requirements Hacker Just Going To Fix A Few Annoying Typos On Company’s Website Before Stealing Customer Data GoodTime®, The Hot New Dating App The Week In Pictures – Week Of March 19, 2018 Completely Unfair That Man Ended Up On Sex Offender Registry Just For Public Urination On A Child Embarrassed Whale Panicking About Huge Barnacle Outbreak Before Date I Am a Designer with a Capital “D” and This Temper-Tantrum that I’m Throwing Right Now is My Latest Masterpiece Trump Hoping To Ride Putin Win To Victory In 2018 Midterm Elections NRA, Facing Increasing Hatred From U.S. Citizens, Reacts with More Intimidating Propaganda Tactics Huckabee Kids Wear Wire at Breakfast Stormy Daniels and President Trump Settle: She is to Replace Sanders The Jerry Duncan Show Interviews Hosts of ‘The View’ BBC’s Video Game On Fake News Backfires | Adobo Chronicles First Deregulated Bridge Set to Open This Year’s Best Picture Nominees Ranked by How Disappointed My Son Was That They Weren’t Peter Rabbit by Sam Rossman The Worst Part About Aging is the Awful Birthday Cards International Criminal Court In Panic Mode After Duterte’s PMA Speech | Adobo Chronicles Florida To Reinstate Dwarf Tossing Sport Justin Bieber is Radioactive! and More of Today’s Absolutely Essential Celebrity News It's God's Fault We Lost the Game The Social Media Verification Badge, Rarest Pokemon of All Which NCAA Tournament Team Will Struggle Most With The Pressure Of Playing Under FBI Surveillance? Hank’s Upset That The Office Rejected His Bracket For Being 3 Minutes Late Doll Real Estate Agent Glosses Over Giant Hinged Opening In Middle Of House Facebook Announces Plan To Combat Fake News Stories By Making Them Actually Happen Vagina Has Five O'Clock Shadow Subpoenaed Trump Organization Financial Documents Reveal Company’s Only Holding Is Single Dairy Queen In New Jersey Here's the Updated Teacher Training Manual Approved By the NRA Ford Recalls 1.4 Million Cars Because Their Steering Wheels Might Come Off The Stages of Spring Cleaning Vatican Delays This Year’s Easter Sunday By One Week | Adobo Chronicles Rick Perry Apologizes For Trying To Outdo Fellow Cabinet Members By Using $72 Million Of Taxpayer Funds On Lampshade Teach For America Celebrates 3 Decades Of Helping Recent Graduates Pad Out Law School Applications Obama Character Witness Testimony At Saudi Perverts Trial Donald Trump Jr. Divorce Leaves Confused, Heartbroken Nation Wondering Why Bad Things Happen To Good People Lowe’s Introduces 2-Way Ladder User Can Also Climb Down The 5 Absolute Best Feelings of the Week (3/16/2018) ‘I Must Make Sure You Have The Skills To Please My Grandson,’ Says Queen Elizabeth Disrobing Before Meghan Markle Stages of Grief About The Election in Aerobics Classes Why Is March Madness The Only Time We Get To See Good, Old Fashioned, Fundamental Gambling? Paul Giamatti Cuts Back On Acting To Focus On Signature Line Of Shapeless Khakis, Rumpled Polos Buttered Popcorn Tops Rankings Of Favorite Jelly Bean Flavor Oh No, I’m Trapped in a Very Special Episode! Concerned Nation Gently Encourages Boston To Take It Easy This St. Patrick’s Day Man Forgives Basketball Hoop That Taunted Him As A Child NASA Study Reveals 7% Of Astronaut’s Genes Change Thousands Of Students Nationwide Walk Out Of Schools In Gun Protest Exhausted Mueller Trying To Find Trump Organization Russia Documents Amid Thousands Of Harassment Lawsuits ‘You Did The Best You Could,’ Says Iron Man Action Figure Voiced By Despondent Toys ‘R’ Us CEO Packing Up Office 8 Seemingly Boring Things You Don’t Think You Care About Until You Grow Up Molly Hatchet Posts Surprise Upset In Former Deep Purple District ‘The Onion’ Hires Several Pastry Chefs Away From Entenmann’s To Form New Bakery Elon Musk Embarrassed After Realizing He Proposing Idea For Thing That Already Exists Who’s Gonna Call the Lyft? 99% Of Employees Would Use Boss As Human Shield In Event Of Workplace Attack Dear Hiring Managers: Please Stop Asking About My Dark Past Bath & Body Works Unveils New Soothing Eucalyptus Road Flare How Police Officers Get Away With Crimes Special Counsel Robert Mueller Spotted Leaving Gypsy Fortune Teller’s Shop Hawking’s voice synthesiser to carry on figuring sh*t out Friend’s Apartment Not Nice Enough To Be Asking People To Take Off Shoes DS-1 Orbital Battle Station Airbnb Listing Proud Billionaire Helps Young Son Open First Offshore Bank Account New Workplace Diversity Initiative Kills One White Employee Every Hour On The Hour Until More Minority Candidates Hired Transcript of Donald Trump’s Interview with Sean Hannity Tips For Securing Your Home Department Of Education Study Finds Only 30% Of Students Adequately Prepared For Spring Musical Construction Union Seeks To Reduce Incidence Of Accidents Involving Babies Crawling On Steel I-Beams Busy Schedule Forces Vladimir Putin To Move Up Election Win A Couple Days Early The 5 Stages of Meeting Someone New Scientology TV Network Sets Launch Heinz Introduces Industrial-Sized Ketchup Packet Angry Letters From a Dropped LEGO Block NRA Ad Director Still Searching For Right Sinister Music To Play Over Footage Of High Schoolers

Fake News

I Just Found Out About Socks, And I’ve Gotta Say, Wow

Buy the Wine Cloud T-Shirt at Awkward T-shirts
dab on them haters t-shirt
I Believe in ReinCATnation T-Shirt Amazon.com
Funny Books Reading T-Shirt Amazon.com
Funny Breaking News T-Shirt Amazon.com
previous arrow
next arrow

Kevin Pagonis

Look, I’m the last person to blindly glom onto whatever hot new lifestyle trend is popular at the moment, but this time is different. I’ve just discovered something that’s so transformative, so revolutionary, I can’t imagine how I ever lived without it. Trust me, this is no gimmick. I’m talking about socks, and now that I’m finally in the know, all I can say is, WOW!

These things are the real deal, folks.

The idea is simple, but genius. You know how you wear different clothes on different parts of your body? Well, socks are basically an article of clothing made just for feet! But wait, it gets better. With socks, when it’s cold out, your feet stay warm. And when they get sweaty, the socks absorb the perspiration so it doesn’t get all soaked into your shoe. You put them on, and it’s, like, bam, you’re suddenly transported to this whole new world of comfort and coziness. I mean, who would’ve thought such a little piece of woven fabric could be so life-changing?

If you’re a bit skeptical right now, don’t worry. I was too when my friend first told me about socks during our pickup basketball game last week. I was like, “What? Gloves for your feet? That seems…uncomfortable.” I’m ashamed to say it, but at the time I laughed dismissively and told him he could go enjoy his little foot mittens without me. Seriously, a small fabric tube just for decorating your feet? What was I supposed to think? But he kept badgering me to try on a pair, so I eventually gave in and decided to humor him.

And oh boy, am I sure glad I did.

It’s like my toes were reborn! If only I’d learned about socks years ago, it could’ve saved me a lot of hassle dealing with the blisters, foot odor, and calluses that plague me almost constantly. There are loads of other benefits too. For instance, now that I’ve incorporated socks into my daily routine, I don’t have to spend so much time bundling up my feet in plastic wrap anymore, which gets me out the door and off to work much quicker in the morning.

Actually, when you think about it, a small fabric sleeve that clings to your foot is really the perfect invention. By creating a soft barrier between skin and shoe, socks offer just the right amount of protection without limiting mobility. Incredibly, they’re also designed in such a way to conform to the exact shape of the foot and ankle. Pure brilliance, if you ask me.

But a note of caution: There’s definitely a learning curve. First, you have to make sure to pull up so the toes go all the way to the very end. Also, always double-check to make sure you’re not putting them on over your shoes. I made that mistake at first. It gets easier with practice, though. Soon enough, you’ll be over the urge to look at them every few steps and barely even notice they’re there.

And once you get the basics down, there’s a whole universe to explore. You can get long, thick socks for when it’s cold out, or smaller ones for when you’re wearing shorts. You can get white ones with a gray heel or dark blue ones with polka dots. And get this: You buy them according to your shoe size, which is pretty clever, since the two almost always correlate.

They truly thought of everything!

“That’s great,” you’re probably thinking. “Socks sound wonderful, but they must cost thousands of dollars.” Well, guess what? They’re only a few bucks, and every time you buy a sock for one foot, it usually comes with a second one for the other! You can even throw them in the laundry just like any other piece of clothing. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s the truth.

What is crazy is now that I’ve started wearing them, I’m seeing socks everywhere. Adults, teenagers—even babies seem to have gotten in on the trend. Personally, I now have an entire drawer in my bedroom just devoted to socks, which is convenient since I tend to put my socks on first thing in the morning and take them off before I go to sleep. But that’s just me. The beauty of socks is that you can wear them whenever you want.

Except while clipping your toenails. I learned that the hard way.

Source link