Homepage / Fake News / Disney Made 'Frozen' Just To Hide An Urban Legend (The Most Plausible Fan Theory Ever)
Plum and Mama Bloopers Radio Station Pulls "Racist" White Christmas from X-Mas Rotation He Sits Askew – TextToons List: White Elephant Gift Exchange Power-Ups Devil's Triangle [Full Episode] He Finally Gets 48 – A Textoon Brexit Dilemma Journal Entries Show That Henry Ford Invented the Weekend in Part Because He Loved to Get Wrecked in a Major Way Bush, Loafers Thrown At Him Reunite On NBC For 10-Year Anniversary Special Kirstjen Nielsen Urges Migrant Parents Leave The Weak Ones Behind This Is The Year I’m Finally Going To Burn Your House Down Charlottesville Jury Recommends 419 Years Plus Life For Neo-Nazi Who Killed Protester Petco Employee Stocks Gerbils By The Cash Register For Impulse Purchases Greatest Factor In Employee Retention Boss Sending Out End-Of-Year Note Titled ‘Thanks Team’ List: Excerpts from the Support Group for Teachers Who Have Eaten Elmer’s Glue Supreme Court Will Not Hear Case On Defunding Planned Parenthood Indoctrinate-TED Parking a Giant Robot is Hard Department Of Interior To Control Rising Mole Population By Releasing Mallets Into National Parks Red Cross Issues Reminder They Can’t Accept Donations From People With Loose Blood Cupped In Hands Most Notorious Criminals In U.S. History I Am Urging You to Urge Others to Push for Climate Change Action NRA Clarifies Mission, Changes Name To National Russia Association Innocuous Thing You Did In Public Prompts Inside Joke That Bonds Group Of Teens For Life The Origins Of Popular Christmas Songs Long Lost “A Christmas Carol” Remake Starring Worst Actors Ever Discovered in Storage Facility Kleenex To Release Special Facial Product For Democrats: “Pity Me Tissues” Theresa May Narrowly Manages To Survive Parliamentary Firing Squad New Smithsonian Exhibit Honors Thousands Of Pets Who Joined Workforce After Owners Left To Fight In World War II CNN Opens Up 24-Hour Anonymous Tip Line For Anyone With Synonyms For ‘Mueller Closing In’ Trump Ex-Lawyer Michael Cohen Given 36 Months In Prison Nation Finally Ready To Look At More Sidewalk Drawings That Look Like Big Holes But Are Actually Just Flat My Boyfriend Wants To Go On a "Gaycation" (Love Advice) Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame Rescinds Nomination After Discovering The Cure Was Voted In As Cruel Prank By Popular Kids Warhammer & The Weasleys Donald Trump’s Criterion Top 10 Mortician Always Keeps Hammer At Tableside Just In Case One Comes Back To Life U.S. Military Honors Sacrifices Of NFL Players By Wearing Jerseys Throughout December Theresa May Delays Vote On Brexit Deal System For Telling Clean Clothes From Dirty Falls Apart By Second Day Of Trip Ayatollah Upset Notre Dame Made NCAA Playoff Instead of UCF Jackets to Buy This Winter Instead of Having a Personality “Lawyers, Guns and Money” Playing Repeatedly In West Wing At High Volume U.S. Coal Consumption Drops To Lowest Level In 40 Years ‘Oh, Was I Not Enough For You?’ Amazon Echo Asks Couple Bringing New Baby Home Delta Plane Jettisons Dozens Of Comfort Animals Midflight Following Policy Changes Orrin Hatch Delivers Farewell Address From Coffin Descending Into Plot Dug In Middle Of Senate Floor Pros And Cons Of Seeking Out Uncontacted Peoples Time Awards Person Of The Year To Targeted Journalists Including Jamal Khashoggi Machiavelli’s Job Application Campbell’s Unveils New Tomato Soup Humidifier The Jerry Duncan Show Interviews Senator Chuck Grassley Michael Cohen Granted Prison Work Release For New Job With Trump 2020 Campaign Eve of Impeachment: A Song Parody Michael Cohen Completes First Stage Of Intricate Plan To Break Incarcerated Brother Out Of Prison From Inside French President Sarkozy Took Million From Gaddafi, Does a Contribution to Obama Explain Benghazi My Girlfriend Has a Dildo From Her Ex-Boyfriend (Love Advice) New York Family Man Latest Victim Of Nation’s Misguided War On Tax Evasion, Perjury, Campaign Finance Violations Bicoastal Time Zone Lesson‬ The Joy of Painting Advanced Weapons Systems Thousands Of Drunk Revelers Dressed As Jesus Descend On Vatican For Annual ChristCon Pub Crawl Every Person In High-End Singapore Casino Either Carrying Out Or Target Of Assassination Frat Nutritionists Dare Americans To Swallow More Live Goldfish Study Finds Average American Gets Most Physical Exertion Waving Cell Phone Around To Get Signal We Were Young and in Love and it was Nuclear Winter Power Harassment Indifference: Income Inequality for Women Persists 2018 Top 10 Comedic News Stories White House Holiday Decorations Through History Trump Threatens to Hold Breath ‘Until Mueller Goes Away’ Trump Claims Substantial Portions Of The U.S.-Mexico Laser Forcefield Have Already Been Built Jonesing Nation Demands Trump Tell Them Where, Exactly, Drugs Are Pouring Into Country Satanic Statue On Display In Illinois Capitol Building For Holidays Soldier Back Home From Serving At Mexico Border Still Having Nightmares About Being Used As Political Prop How To Spot Red Flags With My Married Dom? (Love Advice) Google Translation for Work-Appropriate Self-Evaluations Local Clan Attempts To Intimidate Rivals With Aggressive Display Of Fertility See Plum Run: Official Music Video Authoritarian Secretary Of Transportation Declares She Has Ultimate Right Of Way In Every Traffic Scenario Bertolli Packaging Promises Empty Ravioli Floating In Filling-Saturated Water In Just 5 Minutes Court Filings Suggest Trump Illegally Directed Hush Money Payments Your Horoscopes — Week Of December 11, 2018 Mosquitos: The Best Support System You Never Knew You Had ‘Game Of Thrones’ Fans Now Just Hoping George R.R. Martin Dies Soon So Estate Can Release Whatever He’s Already Written Those Sensors That Flush Public Toilets Were Also Cameras This Whole Time John Kelly Resigns In Last-Ditch Effort To Save His And Trump’s Friendship John Kelly Out As Chief Of Staff MLB Hoping To Boost Attendance At League Meetings With ‘Star Wars’ Night 5 Reasons Why the Donner Party was Better Than Your Birthday Party Woman Trying To Wean Self Off Coffee By Switching To Long Island Iced Tea I Tricked My Girlfriend Into Dating Me For a Bet (Love Advice) White House Ficus To Leave For Virginia Arboretum After Declining Trump’s Offer To Be Chief Of Staff A Dirty Cop's Worst Nightmare At Disney, We Live Every Day In Terror That You’ll Turn On Superhero Movies Flakes On A Plain 5G Phones Coming Petting Zoo All Goats 10 Fun Ways to Market a House Without a Garage The Week In Pictures – Week Of December 10, 2018 Nixon’s Waterloo… My American Scandal I Am Not Like All the Rest: Funny Lines from Online Dating Profiles The Trumpanos: A New HBO Series

Fake News

Disney Made ‘Frozen’ Just To Hide An Urban Legend (The Most Plausible Fan Theory Ever)

There was recently an AskReddit thread about the most plausible/believable fan theories out there – and one of the top answers was something that had been whispered about for a while: the idea that Disney produced 2013’s Frozen as a way of hiding Google results for people looking up an urban legend about Walt Disney being frozen alive. This theory has stuck with me, and I wanted to explain to everyone that this seemingly bonkers fan theory ACTUALLY MAKES A TON OF SENSE. Stick with me here…


What’s the theory?

Disney produced 2013’s Frozen as a means of hiding search results for the urban legend of Walt Disney cryogenically freezing himself.

Why is this a thing?

There is an old urban legend about the remains of Walt Disney that goes something like this: at the time of his death, Disney wanted to retain the possibility that he might live on forever. And not just through his legacy or his theme parks, but literally – and had either his entire body or just his head cryogenically frozen, so that scientists in the future might be able to revive him and offer him immortality. Some even theorized that Disney arranged for his body to be kept beneath the ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ ride at Disneyland.

Alas, none of it seemed to be true – there’s no real evidence Walt Disney ever took the idea of cryonics seriously, let alone arranged for his entire body (or head) to be frozen indefinitely with the hopes of being thawed out at some undetermined future date. Most of the claims can be traced to some shady, unauthorized biographies of Disney – Robert Mosley’s Disney’s World and Marc Eliot’s Walt Disney, Hollywood’s Dark Prince. However, both contain numerous objectively false information, have lots of undocumented claims, and are a little infamous for making outrageous claims (seemingly for the sake of publicity), although it existed as word-of-mouth rumors before being committed to actual books.

There is one small grain of truth to the rumors though: Bob Nelson, the former president of the Cryonics Society of California, claims that he had knowledge of Walt Disney’s desire to partake in the freezing procedure…but he never actually did it:

“Walt Disney wanted to be frozen. Lots of people think that he was, and that the body’s in cold storage in his basement. The truth is, Walt missed out. He never specified it in writing, and when he died the family didn’t go for it. They had him cremated. I personally have seen his ashes. They’re in Forest Lawn. Two weeks later we froze the first man. If Disney had been the first it would have made headlines around the world and been a real shot in the arm for cryonics. But that’s the way it goes.”

So – realistically – the likelihood of there being a huge coverup to mask Disney’s cryogenic freezing seems….extremely unlikely. There is no actual evidence FOR it having happened, and there are mounds of evidence that it DID NOT happen.


It was such a popular theory that it was referenced pretty much everywhere – it’s not-so-subtly a major part of Fallout: New Vegas (and part of a sidequest in Fallout 4), an episode of Family Guy, Futurama, and other assorted bits of pop culture. It was a relatively common belief – however far-fetched – and like any unsavory rumor about its founder, Disney would want to clamp down on that IMMEDIATELY.

Why would Disney go so far as to PRODUCE A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE just to hide some urban legend?


The truth about Walt Disney is this – he was very, very, VERY protective of his company and its image – and that’s his REAL legacy. He believed Disney movies should inspire children, Disney toys should be safe and fun, and Disney theme parks should be spaces for awe and wonder. This is the true Disney ethos – and it is enforced with rigid focus. Know how serious Disney is about maintaining the illusion of amazement and fun at all of its theme parks? VERY SERIOUS.

  • There’s a covert security force that removes drunken or unruly guests from the park, and are almost never seen (they typically operate as undercover agents in the park, so as to not give any appearance of anything dangerous or threatening).
  • Disneyland has a cadre of cats they let loose during off-hours to make sure rodents are never a problem.
  • They are so committed to the ‘reality’ of mascots, you will never see any Mickey, Minnie, Donald, Goofy, etc. ever take off their mask. Even if it’s on a Disney Cruise, and Goofy is f***ing DROWNING.

In short, the Disney corporation understands that they have a very strong brand image as a family-friendly company, and they aim to keep things that way…no matter what the cost. And you know what’s an extremely NOT-family-friendly thing that was constantly being associated with Disney?

Walt Disney being cryogenically frozen to preserve his body for the future.

Now, there’s nothing explicitly gross or PG-13 about that in and of itself – but it implies a preoccupation with death, the inadequacy of modern day healthcare, and total existential dread for the future. These are not things Disney would want kids associating with its founder – he was supposed to be a friendly uncle-type, who was warm and welcoming and a dreamer of dreams. The idea that he was a frozen corpse hidden beneath a theme park was too grisly and gruesome to be allowed to be conversed of, so Disney had to do something about it. But what?

How do you stop an urban legend – something that, by definition – is unmoored by facts or logic, and travels gradually?

In our modern age, there was one clear answer: all rumors, wives’ tales, and urban legends depend on one serve to propogate them, and that was the key to cutting off the Disney cryo-freeze rumors entirely…Google. That is the core way most people find further information on topics they’ve half-heard or are only vaguely familiar with.

But mastering and overcoming SEO is no easy task, even for a company like Disney – Google made its reputation by delivering the results most helpful to people searching for something based on keywords. And anyone searching “disney frozen” in 2011 or before were probably only looking for one thing: information as to whether Walt Disney actually had his head and/or body frozen. So how the hell would Disney beat Google at its own game?


In other words….Disney’s Frozen.


Yes, I am well aware how absurd this sounds – the idea that Disney greenlit and produced a big budget animated feature simply to goose Google’s search results to mask an unsavory urban legend about their founder, but stick with me: Disneyland used to photoshop out images of cigarettes in the hands of Walt Disney from images and portraits, because (despite being a lifelong smoker) they did not want kids to associated Disney with smoking.


There is no company on Earth willing to go to the lengths Disney will to protect its brand image, and the urban legend about Walt Disney’s cryogenic freezing simply would not go away on its own. So what choice were they left with? None. The only answer was to produce a film that could be titled ‘Frozen’ simply to overtake the search results for urban legends about Walt Disney being frozen.

Now – I’m not saying this is LIKELY, all I’m saying is that it’s PLAUSIBLE. We know Disney is insanely protective of their brand, and would probably have liked to find a way to clamp down on disturbing urban legends if at all possible. And we can also see that – since the release of Disney’s Frozen in 2013, Google search results for “disney frozen” are overwhelming about the uber-popular film.

1998 – 2011 Google Results For “Disney Frozen”


Today’s Google Results For “Disney Frozen”

Disney Made 'Frozen' Just To Hide An Urban Legend (The Most Plausible Fan Theory Ever)

This is why it’s a fan theory and not fact – it’s the kind of thing that would be impossible to prove without a major hack into Disney’s email database, and even then, odds are Disney execs were smart enough to not leave a paper trail. So all we’re left with is a premise, the results, and a theory to tie the two together. And while it IS pretty far-fetched, I like to believe it might be true – I like believe Disney wants us all to take the rumor about Walt Disney freezing himself and…



Also, Walt Disney’s final words were “Kurt Russell.” That’s not a joke. He spoke the name of (then child actor) Kurt Russell, for reasons no one is quite sure of. Weird, right? Would be pretty nice if he WAS frozen – then maybe someone could revive him and ask him what the hell was up with saying Kurt Russell as he was dying.

Source link

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.